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augiemirror

SMIRROR SATIRE: Chick-fil-A contract canceled, drag club to fill space

SMIRROR SATIRE: Chick-fil-A contract canceled, drag club to fill space

Starting in the Spring of 2024, students and faculty can perform their own drag shows at the new Chick-fil-Gay drag club. The drag club will take the space of the former Sub Connection and replace Chick-fil-A in the Commons. After campus backlash from the decision to sign a contract with

SMIRROR SATIRE: RE: Augustana University — The Weekly Campus TUPdate

SMIRROR SATIRE: RE: Augustana University — The Weekly Campus TUPdate

Do you know what time it is, Augustana? It’s weather time! Don’t put your winter clothes away just yet, because knowing South Dakota, we can still get a snow storm in May. We are expecting to get, like, four feet of snow with torrential freezing rain sometime in

SMIRROR SATIRE: Athletic director resigns to play on football team

SMIRROR SATIRE: Athletic director resigns to play on football team

The athletic director signed on to play for the Augustana Vikings football team for the 2023-2024 academic year, leaving students surprised and worried. “It was quite a shock when they came to my office a few weeks ago,” the head coach said. “Although our record was 7-4 this past season,

SMIRROR SATIRE: A ghostly review: “Drowsy Chaperone”

SMIRROR SATIRE: A ghostly review: “Drowsy Chaperone”

As the resident ghost of the Edith Mortenson Center theater, I’ve seen more than my fair share of Augustana productions. While many are — and I mean this with the utmost condescension — rather good shows, I must admit there have been some misses. “Murder on the Orient Express”? It’s

SMIRROR Satire: ‘Honor Among Thieves’ is a wonder-woman of a movie

SMIRROR Satire: ‘Honor Among Thieves’ is a wonder-woman of a movie

The new D&D film, Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves, shocked audiences with its fresh and unorthodox approach to the lore of Dungeons and Dragons. With strong acting, solid character development and in-depth world building, the movie did not disappoint. The film features a male-prominent cast but focuses

Forum strives for nonpartisan representation

Forum strives for nonpartisan representation

The Forum section of the Mirror has been a tumultuous branch since the paper was first published in 1908, but its purpose has always been the same: to reflect the opinions of the Augustana campus. For this special issue based around the election, multiple editors from the Mirror attempted to

Tyrannical anatomy table holds students for ransom, asks for free tuition

Tyrannical anatomy table holds students for ransom, asks for free tuition

The Froiland was under complete control of the recently introduced digital anatomy table as of last week. The building was evacuated Monday afternoon when the biology department staff noticed a voice and “electronic beeping sounds” coming from Biology Lab Two on the second floor. Last Sunday night, freshman Jessica Wren